Constructive Criticism

Successful and mature individuals are more than happy to receive constructive criticism… at least that’s what I’ve been told. Now, don’t get me wrong I have had and continue to receive criticism that I learn from but I must admit that it always stings a bit! This is not because I think I am perfect and can do no wrong, in fact, I think it is the opposite… my ego is just fragile enough that it is discombobulated with the slightest of nudges from anyone trying to straighten me up. Yes, I know that is pathetic but I don’t think I’m the only one on board the S. S. Pity Me. So, if you can relate to this maybe we can learn a valuable lesson from King David that will give us perspective on how to receive criticism.
One of the lowest points of David’s life is when he had to flee Jerusalem because his son Absalom conspired against him and gained the hearts of the people (2 Samuel 15:13ff.). David leaves the palace exiting, if you will, by the back door slipping out of Jerusalem via the Mount of Olives. Defeated, mournful and now a fugitive David descends down the northeastern slope of the mount. David and his entourage as they are about to enter Bahurim are met by a relative of Saul named Shimei who curses David and his troops while pelting them with stones. Abishai one of David’s captains offers to cut off Shemei’s head to silence his arrogant taunting. Shemei was shouting that David was a man of blood, a scoundrel who stole Saul’s kingdom and now God had avenged Saul with Absalom’s reign. David surprises everyone by telling them to leave him alone and suggesting that maybe God may have told Shimei to curse David! I think there is more to this than a defeated attitude confessing I deserve whatever comes my way… I think David has a perspective on criticism that we should emulate.
First, David is willing to accept that criticism can and may often be generated from God. That is, Shemei is just a conduit for God’s message and thus we must always listen to hear if we can determine the voice of God in the noise of life. Second, David’s humility illustrates the place from which we best receive the benefits of criticism. And lastly, David is really motivated by a greater goal and thus is willing to tolerate the pain of shame and yes, rocks, to get to reach a greater goal. Ironically this takes place in Bahurim which in Hebrew means, “Valiant or brave.” It really does take an act of bravery to accept criticism from ignorance and misplaced zeal.
Maybe, the postscript to this story is just as valuable… Shimei ends up serving David and lives in Jerusalem under the protection of the King but meets his demise at the hand of Solomon when he once again in his arrogance defies the King’s will. Critics don’t often outlive their criticism… “Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord (Romans 12:19).” -DAN